That sounds made up.

It has been far too long since my last post. I don't have a good excuse. In fact, I don't even have a bad one. I'm lazy and that's all there is to it. I go through blog phases where sometimes it's all I can do not to have 12 different postings in one day. Other times, organizing my thoughts into any sort of cohesive, logical sequence seems really, like, hard and stuff.

Speaking of which, New Year's Eve has got to be one of the most overrated excuses for a hangover in this country.

About two seconds after the final piece of wrapping paper has been torn from the last gift, everybody wants to know what you're doing for New Year's. Now, I think it's nice to have plans and it's lovely to be with loved ones during the holiday season, but I've never understood the drive to get lit and wear a funny hat. Actually, when I put it like that it sounds kind of fun. Eh, you know what I mean.

On a similar note, I've been accused of having a 40 year old trapped in my body since I was about 13 or so. For whatever reason, when the clock strikes 7pm, it's really hard for me to imagine leaving the house. I'm in for the night. It's not because I'm anti-social. It just so happens that I like my tea, I like my pajamas and I like my stories! Now, get off my lawn!

While I think New Year's Eve is best rung in with Asian takeout, board games and a movie marathon of some sort, I cannot pretend that I don't get sucked in by the resolutions.

I absolutely adore making resolutions.

Sticking to them is a completely different story.

If the road to Hell really were paved with good intentions, I would've been there last Thursday. (I would've been there sooner, but I get lost easily. Literally, not metaphorically.)

This year being no exception, I have already made several promises to myself and to... the world? Sure, why not? Here we go:

Sara's New Year's Resolutions for 2009

5. I will exercise a lot so I can eat a lot (I think this is genius, by the way).
4. I will ride my bike instead of driving (as a woman I know says, "LOL out loud!").
3. I will volunteer my time to some sort of humanitarian effort (you know, like disabled gnomes or something).
2. I will stay on top of world and local news (does the opening of a second Chick-Fil-A across town count?).
1. I will put on my big girl pants, find a decent job, pay off my credit card and get accepted into a decent grad school for Fall '09 (mostly because my dad wants his spot on the couch back).

Before you judge me, I will just say that it's not that I don't want to do these things. At heart, I long to be crunchy and organic. It just comes down to the fact that when I don't want to exert myself with physical activity or personal hygiene, I can talk myself out of anything.

Being that I am occupationally challenged at the moment, my mother will often leave me a small task or two to complete before the day's end. This is most likely something as simple as "Move the clothes from the washer into the dryer" or "Buy milk." However, it may as well be "Affix the jet propulsion tank to a squirrel so we may test its ability to alter molecular structure. Oh, and get stamps." Either way, I tell myself that I can't do it and being the easily swayed person that I am, I listen. I am such a pushover for myself.

I would give examples of the excuses I make to not do stuff, but I'm losing my drive rapidly.

Oh, shoot. My stories are on.