I spend most of my time here in Boone with one particular friend.
In this blog, I refer to her as Consuela. Not because I want to protect her identity, but because I think that name is fun to say, especially with a southern accent. Perhaps that's the influence of my preference for Designing Women reruns in the late '90s.
As it happens, Consuela and I spend a lot of time in her car. She goes to Wal-Mart a lot, and I often accompany her because when I'm forced to go by myself (because Wal-Mart is the only game in town), I try to shank people.
When in her car, Consuela and I have many intellectual conversations. Due to my general laziness and her ability to be distracted by a shiny thing, they often sound something (if not exactly) like this:
Sara: ...so, that's what I think we should do. What do you think?
Consuela: What? Say all that again. I forgot to listen.
Sara: You're a child.
Consuela: You are.
Sara: Why is there a rotten banana in your backseat?
Consuela: It was gonna be my snack.
Sara: When?
Consuela: I don't know, shut up.
Sara: You shut up.
Consuela: Stop judging me. Where do you want to eat?
Sara: Not Mexican. I had a really upsetting dream about tortilla chips.
Consuela: What is wrong with you?
Sara: I don't know. Chinese?
Consuela: Ugh, that sounds terrible. Chick-Fil-A?
Sara: Yup. Wow, that was harder than it should've been.
Consuela: What were you talking about?
Sara: I don't care.
I promise you, we're both a lot better at listening to clients than we are at listening to each other.
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19 comments:
Chick-Fil-A is always a wise choice, and usually my first choice, but I have to throw out some other options so that my obsession is better hidden.
You should do a vlog from the car on your way to Walmart.
I agree with Shell. It'd be an internet hit.
Mmmm...Chik Fil A. I might head there for a morning biscuit.
You mean this conversation isn't considered normal? I followed along perfectly myself. ;)
The fact that you try to shank the people of walmart, greatly increases my affection for you Sara.
I'm glad to know there are others like me out there.
Hey, at least you actually manage words! I think at least half the time in my conversations with my friends I resort to animal noises in order to communicate.
i relate with far too many aspects of this conversation for me to feel comfortable with myself right now.
yes, it's hitting a little too close to home and it's making me antsy.
You two are like siblings in how you communicate!
What's funny is that I was completely following that convo there...wasn't lost at all!
Chick-Fil-A should ALWAYS be the first choice, just like shopping at WalMart should always be your last choice.
Hmmmmmmm.... that sounds remarkably like some of the conversations I have on a daily basis with my husband. And I only wish I were kidding.
I get distracted by shiny things too.
And I love Chick-fil-a. Their sweet tea is amazing.
Shove that dagger into my heart a little further... I miss Chik-fil-a with my soul.
The part of my soul that lives in my stomach, anyway.
I'll be honest: one strike against Seattle is that the nearest Chik-fil-A is more than 100 miles away.
Con Sue Ella. Love that fat ass Delta.
Also, tell me about your tortilla chip dream.
Sounds to me (based off of all these comments), that you should sell this skit to Chik-fil-A to use as their commercial. And when you do, I want a cut of the money :) I'm thinking it would only go over if she actually changes her name to "Consuela"...legally.
Sounds like you're sisters.
Wait...what did you say? I wasn't reading.
mmm chick-fil-a. I'm glad you put that at the end or I would have been off in waffle fry-ville missing the rest of this blog post!
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